How to reduce the anxiety caused by digging up memories of your most embarrassing moments.
To my 10-year old brother, it was a funny question. “What is your most embarrassing moment?” he asked, “Mine is when I asked my friend to marry me and she said no.” His thin frame shook in laughter.
I tried to think of a moment to share. As I sifted through the memories, I felt my heart beat faster and the heat rise to my cheeks . Each new stupid thing I had done spun me further down the vortex of anxiety.
What looking back at a sacrificed career can teach you about your vocation as a wife and mom.
Forget the perfect Pinterest project, by the time you change every diaper that needs changing, feed the starving animals you call your children, put the cushions back on the couch for the thousandth time, toss every LEGO block back in the bin, feed those children again, teach them their letters, feed them again, brush their teeth, tuck them in bed, tell them to get back in bed – you don’t have the energy left to stay awake until a reasonable adult bedtime, so you’re passed out in your spit-up-covered jeans on top of the bedspread at 7:59.
One of those days where nothing is really going bad, but nothing is going the way I want it to either. This day has left me feeling down. Not angry or frustrated, but unfocused, unmotivated, dissatisfied.
Sometimes I feel like quitting. It’s too hard to pray before bedtime; it’s much easier to turn on Netflix. It’s easier to press like on the latest post begging for donations to send to Haiti; it’s a lot harder to budget the money to send.too hard to speak up about controversial topics, I’d much rather just mind my own business. It’s more socially acceptable to laugh along with the gossip than to interject some blatantly kind words, or suddenly change the subject. Many times, every day, and every week, I am faced with the choice: follow Jesus, or turn away.